The Training Session – 2
“OK chaps, set the light portable pump into open water and let’s get two fire-fighting jets to work”. The Station Officer directs his men in a drill session down on the canal bank. “Excuse me boss,” says one of the crew members, “This guy’s boat has sunk. Shall we try to refloat it?”
“No reason why not. It makes for an interesting drill. OK chaps” (He loves saying “OK Chaps”, as it sounds a bit daft but it gets their attention) “Put the suction hoses into the water in the boat and let’s get pumping.”
After 10 minutes pumping it’s clear the water is not coming into the barge as quickly as they are pumping it out. Rather surprisingly it re-floats and before you know it, the joyous owner can once again dream of long journeys on Britain’s waterways. He was so grateful he gave a donation to the Fire Service Benevolent Fund there and then.
One week later: the Chief’s mail contains a letter of thanks from this grateful citizen. What a great bunch your guys are, I’ve lost a family member recently, I lost my job and then my barge sank. I began to feel I couldn’t cope and then, when things were at such a low ebb, your guys came and for once something good happened: they saved my barge. The Chief read this and must have had a bit of a mood on. It was known that he didn’t get on with the Commander of the Division where this incident took place and politics came into the equation. He wrote a single line on the bottom of the letter “Did we charge for this special service?” and left his staff to follow up. Someone said that the Chief’s frown usually turns into a load of trouble for someone, gathering momentum as the problem cascades downwards. We found out later that he had a right old go at the Divisional Commander over this, accusing him of not supervising his division effectively. Of course, the Station Officer got it in the neck, despite not actually doing anything wrong. Usual scenario – “My office 0916 tomorrow” and a good old dressing down, with the slight difference that this time the “offender” had a good old go back at him. No surprise however that when the drill dummy incident occurred later, no mercy was shown.
The Training Session – 3
They promoted me to Sub-Officer a long, long time ago. They put me on a watch full of young, enthusiastic guys on a fire station far, far away.Previously, the Divisional Commander had called me to offer a temporary promotion. This was about six months earlier and I turned it down because it was too far away. The words “I’m very disappointed with you, Leading Fireman” came back to haunt me when the permanent promotions came up, and so there I was on a fire station far, far away. You don’t say “No“ to the Divisional Commander.
And so, one December, we went off to the local canal to do a few practise drills. You may notice a recurring theme here – the childish attraction to water that is part of the character of most firemen. Yes, quite right. Fire pumps going flat out, jets arcing along the canal, everyone busy and involved, so I was quite happy that we were doing a decent session. I got them to make up all the equipment and then they started “Can we make a boat?” “What do you wanna do that for?” I ask, “Someone always ends up in the water. Let’s just forget it.” But no, they insist, they want a boat, they want to play.
A boat can be improvised by means of the equipment on the fire engine. It’s a pretty good activity to be honest, because it takes a bit of skill to put the structure together. Basically, you make up a frame and use one of the big water-proof salvage sheets to form a hull around the frame. A spade makes for a handy oar – I knew enough about this enterprise to insist that a short length of line connected the spade to our little craft. Drop the improvised oar and we don’t lose it. Well, we do if we lose the boat as well..... I thought of that too, and arranged for a longer line to be attached to the prow at one end and to a land-based fire-fighter at the other.
Two of the lads, Bob and Mark, carefully embarked and went for a little row on the canal. They got near the far side before realising it was sinking. The two of them started to scramble out but Mark, ever the nervous impulsive type, suddenly yelled out “You forgot the spade!” and pushed Bob back in the boat to get it. Give him his due, he then assisted his cold, wet colleague back out of the water and we pulled the boat (and the spade) back across.
The nearest bridges were miles away. I now had two crew members stranded. “It’s ok” I said, “this canal is only four feet deep. You can walk back across.” With touching faith in their leader, me, they slipped into the water and found themselves out of their depth after taking two steps. This was in December, remember, and the cold clearly took their breath away. Puffing and blowing pretty hard, they got themselves back across and the rest of us helped them out.
They sat in the cab of one of the fire engines with the heater on full blast while the others stowed all the equipment we had used. Meanwhile, I worried that they might be suffering from exposure. No worries there at any rate, as I found them to be feeling lovely and warm after their cold dip – they weren’t in long enough for any bad reactions to follow.
Back to the station, let the lads grab a quick shower and all was restored to normal. No way was I letting anyone else build a boat though......
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