Ever had times when you did not like the way you were acting in a situation or disliked the way you were talking to someone?  It’s happened to me. When I reflected back later (after I had calmed down), realised I sounded just like someone else I knew. That was the scary bit. I really didn’t want to turn out like “them”.

The worst thing was that once the damage was done and I had vented those thoughts and feelings, other people were hurt and this took time to heal. My responses were often knee-jerk reactions which happened on the spur of the moment when I got triggered.

I believed I was powerless to change, thinking that that was who I was. I truly didn't think I could change my behaviour. I spent a lot of my teenage years and early twenty's blaming other people, and justifying my actions and re-actions.

I was not aware that there might be other tools that could help me change so that I could become who I truly was. Rather than being or living the patterns or programmes that “appeared” to be “running me”. Then I learnt about EFT (the Emotional Freedom Techniques), NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) and Hypnosis.

That was when my life and relationships changed completely. I slowly began to realise that my behaviour was my responsibility and that only I could change it - if I chose to. I was certainly ready by the time I was 30 - as I was so tired of being in the same situations, with the same emotions, reacting in the same way and even attracting the same sort of people! How boring was that? But I had lived that drama for so long it actually became my identity.

My first step was reading a book “Women Who Love Too Much” by Robin Norwood. She opened my eyes to what I was doing to myself and in all my relationships.

As I read that book I made a commitment to myself to change. This decision was very powerful for me, and a really crucial one as it took me on an amazing journey of self-discovery and growth. This book was the first step in me reclaiming my inner power.

There are tools that can help to release destructive negative behaviours. They do not have to take a long time, and often (if you work with a trained EFT Practitioner) you will be shown how to use the technique on yourself so that you can maintain the changes you have chosen to make. I thought it would take me years to change old patterns, but the great thing was that these newer techniques (like NLP & EFT) don’t require years of therapy, time, money suffering or struggle.

Often it’s a question of changing key decisions or releasing very old beliefs, events or traumas that no longer serve us. There is no need to go into the drama of it (if you don’t wish to), a lot of these new tools don’t even require you to talk about the pain of the past. You just focus on what you wish to let go of. Sounds too good to be true? I thought the same when I first began! However now I know it can be easy.

But don't just take my word for it, here’s what one person kindly wrote about our work together:

"I cannot express my gratitude in words for the help you gave me last week. I feel like a new man by totally losing all that stress that I have been carrying around for many years. I have not needed alcohol for over a week as the tapping & the recording keeps me very, very relaxed.

Late today, I visited my Doctor to check up on blood tests I had taken early in the week. I told him how you had helped me overcome my problems and he was very impressed. He has not heard of EFT, however he could understand the concept and will be doing some research on the web to understand it better. He suggested that I attend your course in July. That's how much he has seen the change in me. He also said I had won the medical equivalent of lotto!!

He also said that this was meant to be. My wife has seen a huge change in me, but she thinks it is because I no longer have to have a drink in the evenings to relax. I purposely have not told her about the help that you gave me, to see if she noticed any difference. Our marriage is coming back on track. I can't thank you enough."

So as we say goodbye 2009 is there anything you would like to say goodbye to, release and be free of once and for all?