Right, now if youve made it this far so you may as well just grin and bare it as this is the last in the triptych (see, unlike Donald Trump, Matty-Bob really does have all the best words - you can buy some of them off him from WHSMITH Walsall on 10th August - yep, another shameless plug!) of Things You Really Didnt Want To Know About Some Guy You Aint Heard Of.

Matty-Bob began hanging around poets. He found himself, for the first time in his life listening to poetry and taking it seriously. Whilst he loitered with them in the places where they dwelt, darkened alleyways and the backs of shuttered bookshops, they coaxed him into their webs with words that span kaleidoscopic images in his head. He awoke one morning in a gutter, dazed and confused in the arms of Al Barz and Paul Elwell and knew that he needed to take this stuff seriously.

Those two gentlemen were the ones who opened his ears and made him listen, along with the likes of Richard Archer, Matt Humphries, Paul B Morris and Ian Davies, but it was those first two wizened wizards of wordery that beguiled him, that groomed him.

He pestered, begged, threatened, Al Barz for his poems, a book, scraps of paper, to have his words tattooed onto the skin of his stomach (upside-down so he could read it, obviously) and he was horrified when Mr Barz told him he hadnt & got a book out! Thereforth came the birth of Burdizzo Bards, the poetic branch of Matty-Bob & Burdizzo enterprise, and he published Al Barz & CACOPHONY OF STARDUST within seconds of leaving that gutter.

Since then he frequents open mic nights, tries his hand at word-wielding, hoping one day to reach legendary status like those two great men in the backstreet alley and he continues to publish his poet friends books, this venture is virtually non-profitable for him he just wants to help them, and once a year we will see the release of what WILL become the highly anticipated

BURDIZZO BARDS:
POEMS in which Matty-Bob will clutch as many poems as he can to his heaving bosom and release them in a black, jigsaw-piece adorned anthology and give all proceeds to his favourite charity Resources For Autism. Matthew Cash. Burdizzo Books. Burdizzo Bards.

Remember these names, as one day YOU may need them!

(you probably wont though*)

*but you might!